Fewer

(or One More Reason I Shop at Trader Joe’s)

Because, after years of seeing grocery store
signs say, “15 items or less,” these guys
get the usage right—not once,

but twice, at the same checkout stand.
And while they could be accused
of redundancy, it makes my old

grammar teacher’s heart melt like
chocolate peanut butter cups left
in the car too long

to know that someone cares
so much about accuracy that, before
I get in that line, I count the items

in my little red basket to make sure
I meet the criterion. Then I study those
artistic signs, beaming with pride

at the smarts of some other English
teacher’s star pupil who got it
so right.

•••

Quick usage tip: If you can count individual items, use “fewer”
(cookies, centipedes, peanut butter cups). If you can’t count
the items, but you can measure or quantify them, use “less”
(time, money, milk)
.

Photo: Jan Haag
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About janishaag

Writer, writing coach, editor
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7 Responses to Fewer

  1. Terry Stone's avatar Terry Stone says:

    And wouldn’t the same clever usage rule apply, respectively, to greater and more?

  2. Susie Whelehan's avatar Susie Whelehan says:

    Oh, Jan, you just made my day! There are fewer and fewer of us who know this rule.

  3. candyfearless3248eade9a's avatar candyfearless3248eade9a says:

    There’s something about grammar that compels its expert practitioners to protect the rest of us from badly chosen words. I used to be that person before I lost my skills

  4. janishaag's avatar janishaag says:

    Ha! Nicely said, Susie!

  5. Kathy goemann's avatar Kathy goemann says:

    what is your feeling about “the amount of people “ as opposed to “the number of people “? Drives me razy and I wasn’t even an English teacher!

    • janishaag's avatar janishaag says:

      Yep, that’s another good one! Same thing: “number” if you can count them, “amount” if the quantities are uncountable. Good ear, Dr. Goemann!

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